Sometimes, it’s easy to lose touch with your partner after you have kids.Having children introduces a new dimension into a relationship and, as you’ll likely spend most of your time caring for them, you may discover that you have less time for romance with your partner than before.
The stress of raising children, combined with the exhaustion that comes with it, can lead to a breakdown in communication and a growing gap between spouses. Maintaining a healthy and fulfilling marriage requires both partners to make an effort to keep their sexual relationship alive and well.
Thankfully, there are ways to stay close to your partner after you’ve had children. Here are five ways to do just that:
1. Keep communication open
The first step is to keep communication open between you and your partner after the kids come along. This can be done by regularly texting or chatting on the phone or having regular face-to-face conversations. If possible, try to schedule time together over the weekend — when everyone is more relaxed! Discussing your feelings will help you understand each other better and allow each of you to express how you’re feeling. This can help prevent arguments or misunderstandings because everyone will be on the same page when it comes to what they want from their relationship.
2. Set aside quality time with each other at least once a week
Children will grow up fast, so it’s important that you spend quality time with each other at least once a week — whether it’s taking a walk together, playing tennis or going out for coffee or dinner together as a couple! Make sure that this time is unstructured and free from distractions.
The bond you share with your partner is not dependent on your ability to provide for them. If you’re willing to make time for each other, you’ll be able to keep that bond strong. You should also make sure that your partner feels a sense of belonging in your home by providing them with the support they need.
For example, if one spouse works outside of the home, it’s important that he or she still feels connected by offering a hug or a quality time even in just a short time.
3. Be honest with each other
Don’t assume that once your children are off to school and life gets busier, things will be easier. They won’t! The thing that makes relationships work is two people who are honest with each other and willing to listen when their partner has something important to say. This doesn’t mean that you need to agree with everything your partner says — it just means that you need to listen with an open mind and heart so that they feel heard and understood. And then let them know what you think about what they just said! Don’t let small arguments escalate into bigger ones.
When couples fight, they often do so over unimportant things like who gets the last piece of pizza or who got home first at night. Remember that these are just minor issues that could be resolved without causing a big rift in the relationship — so don’t let them escalate into bigger problems!
4. Share Responsibilities
One of the most important things you can do for each other is share responsibilities as well as chores around the house and budgeting for household expenses. This will give your partner an opportunity to gain some independence and experience self-reliance without losing their sense of connection with you or feeling like they’re being abandoned by their partner when something goes wrong.
5. Understanding Finances
A couple’s finances are a sore spot for many. Financial intimacy, or being on the same page with one another about money, is vital for couples who want to keep their relationship on a positive financial track and prevent fights about money. Couples should discuss finances openly, which could help you set long-term goals that would fit your current means. Budgeting and planning efforts can help you and your partner set clear priorities among pressing costs like college tuition, home loan repayment, and retirement savings.
Keep working on keeping things romantic between you and your partner
When you have children, it can be hard to maintain your relationship. You may find that your partner is always busy with the kids and is not able to give you the attention you need. It’s easy to feel like a third wheel and become resentful of your partner’s lack of time.
Instilling serenity and stability into your children’s lives through the love and joy of your marital partnership is one of the finest gifts you can give them.
Your loving marriage will do wonders for the atmosphere at home, making it a secure place for your kids to develop and flourish. As a result, it benefits the whole family if both members of a couple work to keep their romance alive and well.